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On OnlyFans, Erotic Captions Are Becoming Just As Valuable As Bare Skin

Like the modern version of a romance novel, OnlyFans creators are increasingly relying on long, tantalizingly and vivid prose to draw viewers in

Twenty-four-year-old hotwife iCuckoldress is as much a poet as porn performer. Take, for instance, her two-part OnlyFans post “IN HEAT.” Instead of an impersonal, one-sentence caption that typically accompanies other creators’ photos and videos, she opted for a long, graphic, completely engrossing recollection of a sexy evening she shared with a real-life friend. 

“I called my cuck and told him to pretend to be an Uber driver,” she writes atop a video of her fingering herself. “The whole way home, I sat in the back kissing [a man she met at a bar] beside my blonde friend whilst [her cuck] sat in the front.” Then, in the second part to the caption, she describes hearing her friend getting “fucked senseless” in another room while her one-night stand “picked me up and fucked me on the shower mat. … As I lay in his arms, with no choice but to take his huge cock, my eyes started to water from the intensity. I told him that I couldn’t take it anymore, and he told me to sssssh.”

Regardless of how related or explicit the accompanying visual content is, elaborate caption writers like iCuckoldress tend to write about true experiences, only enhanced or stretched out for a subscribing audience. Each caption is like its own 50 Shades of Grey, and since they involve real imagery of the writer, they expand erotic literature beyond its sterotypical audience of pent-up housewives and fan-fic gobblers. Here, regular dudes can get into it, too. 

Admittedly, detailed porn captions aren’t necessarily new. “Historically, [they’ve been written] by horny people typing out their fantasies on their favorite images,” says Geoffrey Celen, a porn expert and founder of porn-ranking site ThePornDude.com. “It’s easy enough for anybody to add an incest, femdom or cuckolding angle to any random nude or anime pic with just a few lines of text, so there are corners of the internet where that type of content has been common for years.” 

Reddit and 4chan are some of them, but OnlyFans and other subscription sites seem to just be waking up to the trend. As Celen says, these captions allow independent models to “sell the realism in a way larger producers simply cannot.”

Erotic captions have also become more mainstream, getting written by performers because they’re creative and horny, not just because they’re trying to flesh out an underserved fetish. Case in point: MILF provider Mrs. Poindexter (aka Crystal Jackson), who runs her Reddit and OnlyFans with the help of her husband Chris.

Crystal’s online persona is informed by her real life (like her persona, she’s a married mom with a science and engineering background), but she’s achieved OnlyFans superstardom because of how she and Chris approach it as a business. “We have guides that other creators can use to learn OnlyFans at an MBA level,” Chris tells me.  “You know, your brand identity, your cost of production.” Part of that model involves tapping into who their audience is (in Crystal’s case, dads with boners) and telling them what they need to hear in order to maintain their interest (and financial contributions). 

According to the Jacksons, story-driven, on-brand captions aren’t just a sexy trend, but a requirement for anyone trying to make real money off of sites like OnlyFans. In a recent post, Crystal accompanied a photo of her wearing heels and stockings with a particularly vivid caption: “My pussy is so wet, a single droplet of moisture is about to drip down my inner thigh and down my stockings. Please don’t let that happen, they’re expensive. Let me just use your mouth to catch it all, okay? And then let me cum all over your face, I can’t control it!” 

In a more PG-13 post of her getting dressed, she lets her readers’ imaginations do all the pornographic heavy lifting. “Okay, I need to go to the grocery store now,” she coos. “You know what would be super hot? Corner one of the young bag boys in the back and fuck him. Then come home to my husband with my pussy leaking another man’s cum in my panties while I make my husband dinner.”

Without captions, Crystal says that a page stops being entertainment and starts blending into “every other page out there.” If they lost the storyline, customers wouldn’t hang onto every post, and there would be no real reason to stay subscribed. You can see boobs anywhere. But there’s only one page on the internet telling illustrated naughty mom stories the way Mrs. Poindexter is. So far, it’s hooked plenty of fans — as one anonymous acolyte tells me, he’s stuck with Mrs. Poindexter for years, mostly because her captions “catch your attention and provoke thought.”

Lis Muhree, another OnlyFans creator who specifically advertises chat services across her pages, echoes this sentiment. “Someone that can keep their audience intrigued with the narrative behind their posts is someone that will have success in this extremely challenging and competitive environment,” she tells me. Since her OnlyFans is more “R-rated” and less pure porn, Muhree lets her captions take subscribers into her imaginary bedroom. 

They read like the dust jacket on the dirty paperbacks you can find on the CVS shelves, the kind with a wind strewn Fabio-type and an anguished woman with a torn-open blouse on the cover. “He picked me up on his shoulders, face still buried in my pussy, and carried me to the couch,” Muhree writes in one of her subscriber-only posts. “I reached around and grabbed his ass pulling him into me. I grinded my clit on the base of his cock. I grabbed his chest and told him to fuck me hard.” 

Erotic literature has been around nearly as long as the written word itself, so bringing that type of sexual and emotional arousal to subscription porn seems like a natural evolution. As iCuckoldress writes in a caption describing a party that only allows men with 10-inch dicks, “It’s essential you read the literature.”